who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
my vag is so smooth its legendary
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
