I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
