Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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