do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
