i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
