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I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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