How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
