Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
