We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize