I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize