Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
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just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
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i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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