Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
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