dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
