That's intense
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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