..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
