she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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