Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
love makes seman taste better
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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