At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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