READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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