So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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