i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize