Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
