Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
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