Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
