when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
just come out here and I will go home with you...
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Randomize
