My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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