Where did you get a picture of my penis
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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