Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
