Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
