Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
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