i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Randomize
