You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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