How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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