I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
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I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
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We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
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