Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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