hotel room ftw
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
