Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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