I wannas sexs uuuuu
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
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