I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
