Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
