what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
