but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Randomize
