did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Randomize
