Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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