she smelled like a LAN party
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
