Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
and you fell through a lawn chair
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
