oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
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Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
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This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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