This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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