Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Rumble strips road head = magical
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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