You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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